Second day off. I woke up with a melancholy feeling and a sore back- looks like it'll be one of those days. Paste a smile on for the kids because, no matter what, mommy is always happy. That's how it should be.
The baby is getting a cold, but had therapy.. He tried pretty hard to make it through in a good mood, but wasn't too thrilled with the puzzle pieces not cooperating. His therapist is amazing- very caring and upbeat. We start a new lesson plan next week and im looking forward to it. Hopefully Griffin will like the activities just as much as the ones he's working on now.
Gauge is jealous that Fin gets a friend to come to the house and he doesn't. I explain what Rachel is here for, and that she's helping brother learn things Gauge already knows. For the most part, he understands.
I wish I could see the world that way again.. With the innocence of a child. To be amazed at the beauty around me. To question everything. I'm trying to get that back. The world, despite its gore and heartbreak, is still beautiful. A flower blooming, a vibrant sunset, snuggling on the couch watching a movie with my sons.. All of that is beautiful. Gauge's singing, Fin's laughter, a phone call from an old friend- I appreciate the little things.
Today is closing, and I am melancholy still.. The absence of conversation from a friend has me on edge. I'm left questioning what I did or said, though I doubt I'll ever know.
Paste the smile back on and start dinner for the kids.. Today really wasn't a productive day, but I got laughter, smiles, and hugs from my children. I have people who love me unconditionally. I have compassion and humor to get me through any situation. I know I'm blessed. <3